The Best Bachelor's EVER

Not too long ago I was asked how I felt about the current crop of "celebrity" bachelors.  I assumed the question had more to do with the fools on that horrid show, "The Bachelor" than it did with movie star bachelors.  But as I thought about it more, I started to question the entire celebrity bachelor scene and, to be frank, it's very disappointing overall.

 It's good to be the bachelor king...yes it is.

Let's get "The Bachelor" discussion out of the way first.  These aren't bachelors.  They're single guys, looking to get famous, rich and, if they get lucky, get laid.  I know, that sounds like most bachelors you probably know.  But these guys are one of two things, greedy shallow dirtbags, or hopelessly looking for love. 

If they're simply greedy, shallow dirtbags, well, then, I suppose they MIGHT qualify as bachelors, since quality of character isn't necessarily a component of being a bachelor.  They're not GOOD bachelors.  Certainly no one I would want to emulate, but they could be bachelors nonetheless.  Now, if they're guys hopelessly looking for love, and willing to embarrass themselves on national TV to do it, then they are NOT bachelors, they're simply single guys.  Read back to some of my earlier posts.  There's a huge difference between being single and being a bachelor.

To be fair, I've only watched one season of "The Bachelor" and even then it was sporadic viewing and through the spaces in my fingers as I covered my eyes.  It was like a train wreck.  But, I learned a long time ago that my taste in television viewing has little to do with what stays on the air and what doesn't.  (seriously, LOST is still on the air, but Freaks and Geeks was cancelled after a season?  REALLY!)

The whole affair of "The Bachelor" seems unsightly to me.  It's not just the bachelors, it's the long line of airheads and bimbo's that parade through the show.  The whole thing is pathetic to me and I would rather they call the show, "Stupid things single people to do get famous" rather than "The Bachelor."  It gives us all a bad name.

So, there's my take.  Sorry for all you "Bachelor" fans out there.  Hope I didn't offend you. 

Anyway, I started looking at the top ten lists of elegible celebrity bachelors and, to be honest, I didn't recognize half the names on the list.  That's probably because most of them are, like, 21 years old and star in shows I've never seen (like Twilight, Sex in the City and Gossip Girl). 

However, there were a couple that resonated with me, like Jamie Foxx and George Clooney.  I don't know a lot about Jamie Foxx, other than the fact that he's ridiculously talented, but he stays out of the headlines.  George Clooney on the other hand, now THAT'S a bachelor.  He might be my top bachelor of today.  That's a guy I respect as a bachelor.  He has fun, he dates numerous hot women, he drinks, he carouses he enjoys his nightlife.  He is everything a bachelor should be.

So, I'm going to put together my top list of bachelors of all time.  These are guys that embodied what, to me, a bachelor is; smart, funny, gentlemen with a touch of rogue thrown in for good measure.  Sure, some of them were married at one point (like Clooney), but when they were bachelors, they were superstars.  They lived, they had adventures, they bedded beautiful women and they enjoyed the freedom that their riches, talent and good looks brought them.  This is why I don't have a guy like Steve Martin on my list.  Sure, he's one of my idols, but he never really took advantage of being a bachelor. 

So here is my list, in no particular order, of some of the best all-time bachelors ever.  Feel free to add to the list, or hammer me for the selections.  Either way, enjoy!

Carey Grant - Suave, talented and slept his way through Hollywood in his heydays.

Hugh Hefner - Come on, how could I NOT have the grandfather of bachelorhood in this list.

Sean Connery - Tough, rugged, has the great accent.  Drinks like a good Scottsman should.

Johnny Depp - The man is certifiable, crazy, talented and is an epic partier.

John Belushi - The guy died from a drug overdose, but before he died, he was known as the hardest partier in a class all his own.  A fat, unattractive man, he embodies bachelorhood because he never let his flaws get him down, and his list of lovers proves it.

Keith Richards -  Seriously, do I need to put an explanation here?

George Clooney - Explanation in a previous paragraph.  Had he been around in the 60's he'd be a member of the "Rat Pack" no question.

Dean Martin - Speaking of the "Rat Pack" Deano was the heart and soul of that particular group of bachelors.  Forget Old Blue Eyes, Deano was the man when they all got together.  The stories told about him during the filming of the original Oceans Eleven alone qualifies him as a bachelor hall of fame candidate.

Hugh Grant - The man was with the most beautiful woman in the world at one time, and he threw it all away for an ugly hooker.  If that's not bachelor wanderlust, what is?

Joe Namath -  The guy was at his height when he won the superbowl, fur coats, big cigars, money and the metropolis of the world at his feet.  He took advantage of it the way only a true bachelor could.

So there it is.  What do you think?  Agree or disagree, comment and to quote another famous actor, "make my day."