Obvoiusly, the picture above isn't from my party. It's a shot from my private party with my beloved cat, Mr. Giggles. We had so much fun together, we sniffed catnip, ate tuna and.....okay, sorry, I can't go on. I don't have a cat, and if I did, it sure as hell wouldn't be called "Mr. Giggles." The pic is a gift for all my female friends, and my one male friend, who love cats, most of whom live with more than one ferocious feline in their homes and apartments. There, see? Despite the fact that cats kill babies, I can enjoy them, too.
Anyway...the party was a blast, friends came to wish me luck on the anniversary of my birth. Drinks were imbibed, jokes were told, cigarettes were smoked, there was much laughing and joviality to be had. I've never put a whole lot of stock in birthdays. For the longest time, I didn't even really celebrate mine. However, in the past five years or so, I've found that I enjoy my birthdays more and more. Strange, huh? As most people get older, they enjoy them less. Just another point proving that I am, in fact, a contrarian at heart.
I had mean to take some pictures of the big bash, but I got a little drunky and alas, no pics to show the fun. My bad. As I said, though, it was fun, getting to hang with some of my closest friends and catching up and appreciating what I have in my life.
But as I was recovering from my stupor on Sunday morning, I came up with this entry idea. The concept of the aging bachelor. Unlike sports figures, bachelors can continue to play the game for as long as they like. But like athletes, age can sometimes make them less effective.
I'm not at the top of my game like I was ten years ago, or when I was in college. But I still have a little game, it's not like you ever lose it, it just gets a bit rusty when not used regularly. I referenced in a recent entry about asking a girl out in a club. She was probably 15 years younger than me, but sometimes you have to just jump into the fray so you don't forget how to play. How are these sports metaphors working for you, by the way? like them? No? Not so much? Okay, I'll stop.
Just a quick note here, Lemondrop.com, a pop culture website just posted a story about the kind of guys women REALLY want. And apparently, the chubby, cuddly, stubbly, geeky type is a hit with the ladies. These guys get extra points for having graying hair. click here or on the website to read the entire story. The nice thing is, most aging bachelors are slightly bulging in the middle, are too lazy to shave every day and probably grew up on Star Wars, making them honorary geeks, even if they never played Dungeons and Dragons.
The point is, age in a bachelor isn't always a bad thing. I think it really just depends on the kind of person you're trying to attract. My issue is that I generally am attracted to women much younger than I am. My friend Meredith calls it age-inappropriate relationships. I suppose an aging bachelor can be a sad figure, but I don't look at it like that. While I can no longer score with the girls in their early 20's like I used to, the group of women who I find myself attracted to has gotten larger as I've increased in years.
Plus, and here's the really cool part, with age comes a little wisdom. I don't make the same mistakes I used to make. Certainly there is still a little bit of self-sabotage that takes place whenever I'm in a relationship, that just seems hardwired in me and I can't stop that, I can only hope to contain it, just like Michael Jordan. But I am smarter and wiser and more experienced than when I was rampaging through the bars and clubs of Boulder.
I don't waste time with relationships that are doomed from the start...not as much anyway. I find I'm a little pickier about the people who I want to spend my time with and I value that time so much more than I did when I was younger.
Like a fine wine, I think bachelors can actually get better, increase their game, and happier, less frustrated, as they grow older. Of course, I think this also holds true for bachelorettes as well, so, take heart ladies. Yes, I know this might sound like some kind of strange rationalization for adding a year onto my calendar, but it's not. Aging bachelors still have a lot to offer. Sure, they're fighting the battle of the bulge, just like everyone else, and some are balding, others are graying, but they also have more to offer.
And, lest we forget, an aging bachelor makes a better lover. I think so, anyway. Yes, we might not have the stamina we had when we were 20, but at least we know what we're doing. I suppose, for the ladies, it comes down to whether they want young and sloppy, or mature and knowledgable. Plus, ladies, aging bachelors are more likely to enjoy foreplay. Of course, we'll eventually fall asleep afterwards, just like we did when we were younger, some things really don't ever change.
So, bachelors and bachelorettes don't look at other aging bachelors with pity. Yes, we might go through a little mid-life crisis now and then, or suffer a minor emotional breakdown, but open your minds and you'll find a treasure in someone you might not have ever considered before.
Me, I'll probably still cast an eye on the young'uns every now and then, I can't help it. Especially doing theater, it's just chock-full of actresses in their mid-20's with "daddy" issues. Besides, in the immortal words of Professor Farnsworth, I don't think I'm robbing the cradle, it's more like she's robbing the grave.
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