Spring Is In The Air!

I love Winter.  I'm a big fan.  I love the cold, the clouds, the gray skies and falling snow.  Nothing is as peaceful and relaxing to me than a cold winter night when the streets are deserted and the snow is falling and the only thing you can see from your window is the soft glow from the streetlights.  It's heaven to me.  Plus, girls wear sweaters, and we can all agree that sweaters rock, right?

Alas, there is ONE problem with winter that I have to deal with; jeans.  Not that I have to wear jeans, I do that already.  I'm talking about the women with jeans. 

Okay, okay, before you go all Gloria Steinem on me, I have no problem with women in jeans.  Jeans are fine.  Here's the thing, though, I love skirts.  No, not on me, fool, on women.  That's because I'm a leg man.  I'm not a breast guy. 

Damn woman...that's just...hot!

Of course, when I tell women this, they absolutely don't beleive me.  For some reason, women are raised to believe that the only aspect of thier body that men pay any attention to are the breasts.  This couldn't be further from the truth.  Some guys are ass guys, some prefer breasts, guys like me are leg men.  I even know some men who are attracted to necks and there's one guy I know who absolutely goes wild over nice ankles.  Don't even get me started on the ones who adore feet. 

The point is, breasts are only one aspect of the female form that men pay overt attention to.  Sure, nice breasts look great in sweaters and great booties are slammin' in tight jeans.  But for me, nothing beats a great set of pins in a dress or skirt (I've somehow reverted to film noir-speak for no apparent reason, sorry). 

Spring Has Sprung!

This is why, despite the rising temperatures, the allergy attacks and the terrorizing winds, I love Spring.  I don't adore Spring.  I mean, I'm not planning on marrying it or having tiny little seasons.  That space is reserved for Winter.  But I do have a serious crush on Spring.

I love Spring because women's fashions just fit my fancy better.  Suddenly the large heavy coats are tucked away in the closet, those horrible, horrible boots return to their rightful place under the bed and the jeans are replaced with skirts.

I was at the Corner Office last night, a tiny little bar near my apartment.  It's kind of a yuppie-ish, retro-style bar that caters to downtown professionals and theater-goers.  I was sitting with a couple of friends and the topic of women's dresses came up.  Before I go forward, I have to mention that there was at least one woman involved in the conversation.

Not all the guys were leg-men, but, as men, we all could appreciate a nice set of women's gams (seriously, I'm going to use all 1950's terminology for women's legs).  Some of the guys liked the short shorts, others liked the cheerleader skirt, the schoolgirl skirt, the pencil skirt, the poodle skirt, etc.  What we all greed on was that skirts and dresses are way undervalued by women today.

We also could agree on another aspect; the 50's look is hot. I don't know if it's the popularity of the TV show, Mad Men, but more and more women are sporting the dresses that fall just below the knee.  There's also something to be said about women's fashions in the 40's, 30, and 20's as well.  I don't know why, but I've always loved that look.  It's seductive and still sexy.

The dresses that are the best leave something to the imagination.  They hint at sexy, without revealing too much.  It announces a challenge, something to work for, it allows for the chase, teasing but not letting in too easily.

She's Got The Look!
A History Lesson

And maybe that's why men love the "look" of the skirt or dress.  We all know that men love the librarian look, the secretary look, the schoolgirl look, the cheerleader look.  Certainly there's an element of innocence that men find attractive.

From an anthropological standpoint, there's a reason why men tend to be attracted to the "innocent" appearance, and no, it has nothing to do with pedophilia...get your minds out of the gutter.  In the Neolithic era, most people wore the same things.  Hides, woven camisks of leather or basic fabric.  As a species, we weren't worried about slutty or demure.  You just wore clothes to hide the naughty parts.

As we evolved, we continued to care little about the clothing that men and women wore.  In fact, until about 300-250 BCE, men and women wore very similar clothes.  Certainly the Greeks and Romans wore clothing that differentiated themselves, such as large flowing robes, capes and dresses, even the men.  But this had more to do with status rather than separation of the sexes.

Let's jump ahead to just after the fall of the Roman Empire, though and see how everything changes.  Suddenly we're dumped into a world of kings and peasants, the plague, and religious dominance and intolerance.  During these formative centuries, women who were promiscuous tended to dress more provocatively.  They were shunned and generally died from diseases.  Diseases that were often passed on to the men who paid for their services.  These men also often died from horrible diseases.

This sexual repression carried on through until the 20th Century.  Even in more developed societies such as England and France, it was the woman who dressed "high class" with clothing that  covered nearly every bit of their bodies, that were desired.  The prostitutes dressed entirely differently and were often, again, diseased and died young from horrible diseases.  Are you seeing a pattern here?

There's a purity in the "looks" that me are attracted to.  There's a safety and class about those looks.  Plus it brings out the primitive man inside of us to want to protect.  It makes us feel needed, powerful and respected. 

Go Out and Get It!

Me, I simply love women in skirts and dresses.  It can be a pleated skirt, a 50's housewife dress, or a secretary's pencil skirt.  I don't care.  I just love the look.  There's something about a woman who wears a skirt with confidence.  It says want me for my body, love me for my brains, or soething like that.  Unless of course they're wearing a skirt that falls way too high on their thighs, then it just says love me because I'm slutty...which is just fine as well.

In the end, it comes down to the changing of the seasons.  Spring is one of my favorite times of the year precisely because women start showing off their legs again.  Bachelors are particularly sensitive to the areas of a woman's body they are attracted to.  If you want to snag a bachelor, find out what he likes and then doll it up.

If he's a breast guy, wear sweaters, show off that cleavage.  If he's a leg guy, start wearing skirts.  If he's a butt guy, toss on those tight jeans.  And if he's an ankle or foot guy, well, move to Bermuda and throw your shoes and socks away.

Take advantage of the season and show off what you've got, ladies.  Bachelors will respond.  After all, it's been a long, cold winter.  Let the thaw begin!